Questions of our Cavs reality

If you've never watched the show Lost before, well, you can't start now because it is confusing. Anyhow, last season there was a big decision, one that could alter the fates of the cast and possibly the rest of the world—or nothing could really happen at all. No one was sure. That season ended and no one knew how this season would start. Which reality would we be in? The answer is both. The show, at least this far, has parallel narratives. Two worlds, one in which they changed the future, and a second where they changed nothing. And thus far, we are watching how both of them play out.

I wish I had this ability with the Cavs for the rest of the season.

After heisting Jamison from Washington and sending Z out of a Cavs uniform for the first time since I taped new episodes of Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Danny Ferry has altered the course of Cleveland sports, for better or worse ... or maybe it's a push. Unfortunately, we can't see all of the realities play out. Here would be our options:

• Stand firm. We keep Z, keep the team intact, ride the 13-game win streak, maintain yet another dominant regular season and make a run at the first title in close to 50 years in Cleveland. Maybe we don't win it, but we have a better chance than last year where matchup problems that were obvious in the regular season ultimately sunk us in the post season. That was corrected in the offseason, or so it seems, so there really is no NEED to make a trade—at least for this year's goals. But beyond this year? Two old centers with expiring contracts and the same average to mediocre supporting class staring the Greatest Free Agent of All Time in the face as every NBA team with a max contract courts him.
Title possibility: 75%
Keep LeBron possibility: 65%
Possible level of regret: (1 out of 10): 7

• Trade Z, part 1. We trade Z for Antawn Jamison. Jamison takes a couple games, gets acclimated, plays solid and fits in. Z gets bought out by the Wizards, waits 30 days and comes back. Rotations get set and we roll into the playoffs like Sherman through Atlanta. In the off season, having a quality, near-All-Star teammate to pair with Mo Williams and Anderson Varejao, LeBron is slightly more intrigued to stay put in Cleveland.
Title possibility: 95%
Keep LeBron possiblity: 80%
Possible level of regret: 0

• Trade Z, part 2. We trade Z for Antawn Jamison. Jamison takes a couple games, gets acclimated, plays solid and fits in. Z either stays with the Wizards or signs with another team, causing the saddest sight since that oil spill in Saved By The Bell left all of those ducks covered in oil. Rotations get set and we roll into the playoffs. Z, in another uniform, possibly watches the team he gave his heart and soul to for 13 years win a title without him. In the off season, having a quality, near-All-Star teammate to pair with Mo Williams and Anderson Varejao, LeBron is slightly more intrigued to stay put in Cleveland.
Title possibility: 90%
Keep LeBron possiblity: 80%
Possible level of regret: 10

Would all of these scenarios net a title? Do none of them? Which scenarios keep LeBron? Where is John Locke when you need him?

.............

In our singular reality, we know scenario No.1 is out, and we're all rooting for No.2, but No.3 is definitely in play. If scenario 3 happens, I'm going to constantly wonder how scenario 1 would have played out. If we don't win the title, I'm going to wonder if we messed with chemistry too much or inflicted "The Curse of Z" on the team and lost for karmic reasons. I will feel like we should have stood pat.

But I'll feel a little bit of relief too.

Why? Because I don't want to live through a reality where a Cleveland team finally triumphs and takes home a title with the blood of our most loyal soldier on our hands. I don't want to wash the dirt of that trade off in the champagne celebration. I want the championship to feel earned, not coldly acquired. I don't want the joyless, robotic happiness of a Yankees title celebration.

I want the guys that deserve to be there to be there, and really, the only guy that deserves to be there is Z. I know LeBron deserves it the most in one respect because he's responsible for our title hopes, but LeBron doesn't know what it's like to play on shit teams in front of 10 people or face the possibility of retiring early because of injuries. LeBron hasn't spent his entire career loving this city. In fact, we're in constant fear that he doesn't love us. Hell, half the reason Z was traded is because LeBron might leave us this summer.

We had to pry Cleveland out of Z's cold lurpy hands. That's the difference. That's why Z deserves it more than anyone.

But I might want something that's impossible. If pro sports has shown me anything since my birth, it's that evil wins. The Yankees buy players, and they win. The Steelers break a guy's knee in half with a dirty play, and they win. Belicheck spies on teams and he wins. Barry Bonds becomes the homerun champ. Maybe the only way to break our generational losing streak is to trade in our soul and our integrity.

And if that is indeed the price, I'm not sure I'm going to feel it was worth it. I might think it was worth it. (Ah, who am I kidding I'll be drunk for 3 months. I'll feel it was worth it.) And if I do, I'm not sure I should. Layoffs and outsourcing are always worth it to CEOs when they keep the business profitable, but that doesn't necessarily make it right. These are the questions I don't want to answer. I want to win a title and I want to win it as a Cleveland team, not a Boston team.

... But then again, I do want that title monkey off the back of the city. I'm tired of Cleveland just being a city of losers, leading lists of miserable cities and causing laughter among sports pundits. Maybe the greatest sacrifice Z could make for the city he has adopted as his own is to be traded to build this team and let it win a title.

All I know is I read Faust. Deals with the devil don't work how you plan. They might work on paper, but they don't fill the ultimate void in your life. Fortunately, we have an out Faust didn't have. It's scenario 2. The buyout, 30-day loophole. It doesn't guarantee a title much more than any other scenario, but it guarantees us our soul. And I think that's what matters to me the most.

I think.

Just like Lost, there are too many questions and too many possibilities. How will it play out? How will we feel? Is there a perfect plan? We'll definitely get a conclusion, but I'm not sure we'll get an answer.

Go Cavs.

Et tu, Ferry?

Woke up today to strong rumors suggesting that Amare Stoudemire will come to the Cavs in exchange for JJ Hickson and Zydrunas Ilgauskas.

I'm the guy who wanted a trade at last year's deadline. I'm the guy who wanted a trade for the first few months of this season. I'm the guy who continues to say this team is LeBron and a bunch of scrubs (admittedly, a bit of an overstatement) and would be unstoppable with a legit second-banana All Star to pair with LeBron.

Stoudemire is an All Star. So why am I so bummed out?

Well, it's partly because I no longer feel this team needs to make a trade. We don't have the matchup issues that inevitably ended our season last year. I don't think our league best record is the fool's gold it was last year.

And it's partly because I'm just not a big fan of Stoudemire. From everything I've heard, he's kind of a pouter and a headcase. He needs the ball, valuing his role more than victories. He didn't mesh with Shaq last year. He is an atrocity on defense. He owes a lot of his career success to Steve Nash, and I'm not convinced his potential positives will outweigh his negatives—especially considering how much of our success comes from our elite team chemistry.

But mostly I'm bummed because we'd be trading Z.

The thing is, trading Z makes perfect sense. He's a big expiring contract with a diminished role on the team who could net a starter from another team looking to dump salary. He's like Wally Szczerbiak was last year, you know, when we didn't make a trade to improve the team and inevitably lost in the post season. So what's the difference?

Z is the Cavs! Yes, I said it. LeBron is our savior, but Z is family. We're not sure if LeBron is going to stay with us; Z came from halfway around the world and adopted our city as his own depressed, cold home away from depressed, cold home. He wanted nothing more to stay with the Cavs, even though the team was more unwatchable than an episode of Teen Mom. We Cleveland fans like to think we deserve a title, but we just sit on our couches and watch guys play. Z has been here for 14 years—much of which has been filled with foot injuries and bad teams. If anyone deserves a chance to win a title because of dedication and perseverance, it is Z, not us.

If we trade Z, we're spitting on one of our own. If the move wins us a championship (a large assumption), it's tainted. We're the fans that despise Jim Thome and Carlos Boozer for taking more money and leaving us behind, right? Well then shouldn't we extend our hearts and show loyalty to the proud few who choose to stay here? Can we really root for or enjoy a team that sent a loyal guy packing when it didn't really need to?

Allegedly, Z will be bought out by the Suns and then we will sign him back after 30 days, which would essentially give us Stoudemire straight up for Hickson, which is a pretty good heist, despite everything I've said about Stoudemire. Can't fault that move if it happens (you know, unless it wrecks our chemistry).

But I don't trust it. I watch Big Brother, and when an alliance tells someone, "Hey, we're going to just put you up on the block as a pawn. We're not voting you out. No seriously, we're not. I swear to God, you are just there as a patsy. We're voting out the other person." That person goes out every time.

Not that beggars can be choosers, but that's not how I want to win a title. I don't want the pursuit of the ultimate goal to compromise our integrity as Cleveland fans. I mean, I've seen the people that sell their soul to win Big Brother. They are douchebags. Sure, they are douchebags with half a million dollars, but they are douchebags nonetheless. Just keep that in mind when you watch Z walk out that door.